Diet

Yesterday Sarah came over so my friend could fix her computer. He spent 3 hours doing what would have taken me all day to have done, at least that is what Sarah said. While we were waiting Sarah asked me for some ice cream. She knows I ALWAYS have ice cream. I guess I am kind of addicted! She asked if I had any "good" ice cream. She looked at what kind I had and she didn't like chocolate cluster ice cream. I asked her what "good" ice cream. She said she wanted Neapolitan. I said ok, if she could pronounce it right! She ended up pronouncing it correctly, so I drove to Safeway to buy ice cream. As I walked in I was struck with an idea, remember I'm random, I decided that I was going to start on my diet again. I think I know how to diet, I have done it before. In fact, I once lost 40 pounds, from 210 to 170. Now that I think back on it I was a little amusing, I went in for my annual medical check up and I seriously asked the doctor how to stop loosing weight. I was like a weight loss machine. I found the secret to loosing weight was to eat. Not a lot, but eat every 2 hours. I at something every 2 hours, so I was never really hungry. I tried to limit what I ate to 200 calories each time I ate. I found that to diet was a way of life. I bought exactly what I would eat each week. I didn't snack, and I didn't go places I would be tempted to eat out of my diet. I did cheat, sometimes. I remember the time I went to McDonald's and had a Big Mac. It was that big of a deal that 7 years later I remember that exact feeling. I guess I will do that again. I liked when I went in the gym and they asked me to take another picture because the picture they had taken when I signed up didn't look like me any more. I will try to post those to pictures on here when I post this blog. I just weight myself and I am 192, my doctor called me obese a few months ago! I will go to a party tonight, so I will start tomorrow. I will try to keep the readers up to date by posting my date every month. Wish me luck!

Randomness

Yesterday I did nothing. I played Settlers of Catan a few times on line, and learned how to use my new clothes steamer, and did some cleaning. It is fun to do nothing sometimes, allows you to get energized for the next few days. I wonder if we do the same for years too, do nothing for a few years to prepare us for the coming avalanche of things to do in the future... or have done in the past. One reason I liked Indiana Jones movies was it was constant action from beginning to end, you finish the movie looking at your watch and wondering where the time went. Sometimes years go that way, you look at the calendar and wonder where the months went. I guess I'm getting old when I realize that. If you have read a few of my writings you know that I go in random directions. I do that when I speak and teach too. I often try to change that, I try to do things in a methodical step by step direction. But, it goes "random" pretty quick. When I teach I know I should introduce the subject, then build on that step by step to get to a final goal ... but I go off on tangents pretty easily and I don't even know where it will end. It is the same when I write here. Today I thought I would write about how much I have affected people throughout their lives, without me even knowing about it. I was going to talk about how this blog affected my sister to write her blog, www.suesgene.blogspot.com. Then I started writing and thought about writing about how American adults play games and how few other countries have adults playing games with other adults and/or children. Then I thought about how I went through the day yesterday thinking about what I was going to write in my blog and decided to talk about how I got a new device no one ever showed me how to use and how we do things the same way our parents did, or teach the way our teachers did. As I was writing the two cats demanded my attention, one spilled open the silverware drawer and the other laid down on the keyboard and I was going to write about how things through our lives don't allow us to reach the goals we had thought we wanted, and instead we reach the goals that we really did want. As I was thinking about all those things I realized that I really wanted to write about my philosophy of being an Angel, and how I really don't want to be, but I couldn't find the Bible verse I wanted to quote. I guess those will all be topics for future writing, because I really want to write about all those topics! Today I just wanted to write about how random things go through our heads all at the same time. I took a class on using music in the classroom a few years ago. The teacher suggested we play music during the time students were doing seat work. Her rationale was that silence wasn't natural. In nature you have a lot of background noise. Either animal sounds, wind rustling the trees, crickets, waves, always something. So, she suggested that if you quietly play music while the students were studying in class their minds wouldn't wander so much. They could concentrate more on what they were doing, and instead of thinking about what they were going to have for lunch, or what their mother was going to yell at them for, or what they were going to write about when they got home they would be listening to the background music. Then she explained that the music you play should follow some criteria. Most important was it shouldn't have any words, or you would sing along with it instead of it just being background sound. The best music should be baroque music, because it is at the same rhythm as a resting heart. I thought maybe the best thing to play was those CDs (at the time I thought about tapes, tells you how long ago this class was) that have natural sounds, like ocean waves or forest sounds (but definitely not jungle music). I have done this in a few classes I have taught and it usually works well after the students get used to it. I have even had students complain when I stop doing it. See how random this writing goes, I had no idea I was going to talk about that today, I haven't thought about it for a long time. I wonder what I will write about tomorrow ...

Gift Giving ...

Today I took a friend downtown San Jose to go to the Tech Museum. She ended up staying there for 7 hours, and will go back again later because she didn't see it all. Then I took the cats to the vet to get their booster shots. I had a good day, sitting in the house and watching it rain outside! In the evening I took my daughters (I can't say "kids" any more) to the Outback Restaurant to use the gift certificate my mom gave us so we can have dinner together, THANKS MOM. It was a great gift and I was really happy when I received it. I have come to realize the best gift you can give someone is to appreciate it when you are given a gift. I wear a gold chain around my neck that my parents gave me when I was in college, they got it when they were in Saudi Arabia. It helps me remember them. On the chain I wear a pendant of the "lone cypress". It is there to remind me also ... of my ex-wife. I gave her the pendant for Christmas many years ago, and she threw it back at me telling me I was very cheap and she was angry that it wasn't bigger. I kept it, and wear it now to remember how important it is to appreciate any gift I get. My daughters often give their mom gifts, and they know that she will always take it back and get what she wants. I know how stressful it is for me to pick out a gift. I guess I could always get gift certificates, but to me that isn't as personal as a gift. But, if someone gives a personal gift, I think it is a little rude to take it back. I do see one exception, I gave my daughter a bottle of my favorite perfume this Christmas, just to have her remind me that I gave the SAME perfume last year to her! And she never wears it. I guess she doesn't want to smell good to old men!

Lines and lines and then more lines ...

Today was a great day, making it officially a great weekend!! Thursday bowling with the kids, Friday wrapping gifts then dinner with the kids, Saturday lunch with a couple of friends and then GAME NIGHT with the kids again!! (that was the highlight of the YEAR!), and then today a friend of mine made lunch for me (his cooking wasn't half bad). When I went to bed last night my plans were to meet some of my students at a sports bar to watch football, but I got a call at 9am to help a friend of mine take her brother's visiting family to the outlet mall and then at 11am to go over to Don's so he could fix me lunch. We had some soup and baked check, then went over to the sports bar, then I let him stay at my place while I went with another friend to help her take her family and her brother's family to the Gilroy Outlet Mall. I don't like to go shopping on normal days, this is the day after Christmas, EVERYONE was shopping. I didn't do shopping today, I was people watching. It was fun. I was trying to herd everyone together, and make sure no one got lost, and in the mean time I saw some really interesting things! Someone tell me why they were standing in line for 2 hours to get INTO the Coach Store. Then once they got in their and found something to buy (why do the most expensive stores have the least amount of merchandise on the floor?) there was another line, that took at least an hour, so they could buy something. Ok, I couldn't hold my laughter! Poor guys ... you know the men wouldn't wait for that unless the woman TOLD them they would! There was a line of about 50 people just to get something at Starbucks. There were lines in every store, not to get into other stores. I talked to some of the sales people, as I was waiting for the people I wasThe  with to wait in line! The sales people were cranky and tired and exhausted. Then there were lines for the bathroom, those are the worse. When I cornered the group in one store, everyone was standing in a line I went to one of my favorite stores, a kitchen gadget store. I love looking at the weird stuff they dream up to sell. Today I saw the most useless "gadget" I could imagine. I think they called it the "cake tester". You know how when you cook a cake you take a toothpick and poke it into the cake to see if it is cooked throughout? Well, this gadget was a stainless steel "toothpick" that you buy so you can stick it in a cake to see if it is done. Is that as useless as I think? Now I know why my mom needed 3 drawers for kitchen gadgets!! Can anyone tell me why some women wear skin tight pants and 6inch heels to walk around the outlet mall? And, where do some of these women get these shoes that are plaid, and why would they wear them? What about that man that was carrying his wife's umbrella for her while she was carrying the bags, but the umbrella wasn't over either one of them, it was over the bags between them? The best thing about going shopping is people watching, but then again I realize they are people watching me also!!

Happy Christmas

Today is Christmas. I went to lunch with two friends. I took my Chinese friend, Don, to try burritos at my favorite Mexican restaurant. I enjoy sharing things with him, he appreciates everything and is always fun. After I took Don home I went home and my kids came over. We played an old card game called Flinch. My siblings and I used to play Flinch at my grandmother's house when I was 9. We played with some real "characters". Besides my three siblings, I was the youngest, we played with Uncle John, Uncle Frank, and my grandmother. My father was in Korea for a year when we lived in Illinois. Uncle Frank was my mom's uncle, my great uncle. He used to do things like throw coins in the yard for the kids to run after, he was famous for eating anything on a sandwich. He would say, "it all ends up in the same place". Uncle John was my mother's brother. He was just a few years older than my mom, he was a lot of fun and we always enjoyed when he was around. He was going to college at the time we lived there, but came and visited often. He liked to have fun, like when we found an old parachute in the barn (they lived on a farm) and he hooked it up to the back bumper of his car and it almost ripped the bumper off. We would play Flinch often, it was fun to play with all the relatives. I won often, and they would all be upset and accuse me of cheating. The problem was, I didn't know how to cheat. The wouldn't accept that and just say I cheated. I didn't know how to increase my chances of winning by cheating. I won because I was lucky, not skill and not cheating. Today was fun, there was lots of laughter and yelling. Whenever we play games Jayne always wins. Today we played 3 games and Jayne won the first game. After that no one else cared who won as long as it wasn't Jayne. I laughed a lot because I knew exactly how Jayne felt. The kids didn't know why I was laughing, but any of my siblings would know. It is fun watching my kids grow up and overcome the same obstacles we had when we were young! Live is Good!!!

Memorable Christmas

Since I have been alone, since 2001, I have always had the same family tradition for Christmas Eve (except for one year). I always get together with my kids for Christmas Eve dinner and exchange gifts. One very fun time we had was when we all tried to teach Lindsey how to drive. She had just gotten her permit and we went over to a large parking lot near my office and she drove around the parking lot, and even spent about 5 minutes on the open road. It was a lot of fun and very memorable. The past few years we have been going to a Japanese restaurant where they cook at your table. It is fun and as the kids get older that time we spend together gets more and more valuable. I love my daughters very much and cherish every moment I get to be with one or all three of them. Our first year in Korea, when Jayne was 1, we lived in a very very small apartment. It was on the fifth floor of a walk up. It had no furniture and we sat and slept on the floor. That was ok since Koreans heat the floor and it was warm and cozy. I had some difficulties, it had no shower so I had to take sponge baths, on the unheated enclosed balcony where the toilet was. It had no water pressure in the morning until 10, so we had to fill pots with water the night before. Life was tough, but our family was together and we had some great times! I worked as a tutor for many hours a day, 7 days a week. Christmas didn't have any significance as a holiday so I was supposed to work. I did take that one day off. We had talked about what to get the kids for Christmas. We decided I would get things on Christmas eve at the underground market by the bus station. I worked that day until 9pm. I had picked up the gifts on the way to my last appointment. I got 2 big bags of toys and stuff. I took the subway home and walked home from the Songnae subway station. I walked up the 5 flights of stairs and finally got home around 10:30. The kids, Lindsey and Jayne, were asleep under the tree. They were waiting for Santa Claus. They were so cute. We put the gifts under the tree, next to the kids, very quietly. Then I SLAMMED the door and then opened it as the kids were waking up and yelled down the stairs, "Bye Santa, thanks for coming". Lindsey jumped up and bolted out the door and down the stairs. All the way she was yelling, "Santa, wait for me, wait for me!!". I was smiling and trying to hid my laugh. We spent the next 2 hours opening gifts and playing with the new toys. Thinking of that story always brings a smile to my face.

SSSssshhhhhhhh...

I am a secret shopper. If I told you what that means, I would have to kill you! ... Okay, that isn't quite true. If I told you what that means I would not be able to be a secret shopper in your shop. Today my assignment was to go to an electronic store and inquire about buying a camera. Then I must buy something worth at lease $25, and then bring it back in to the store and return it to the store. The company wants me to evaluate it's employees and the store itself. I have to go into the bathroom and comment on its cleanliness. I really believe a store can be evaluated by its bathroom. Today the men's room had no sign on the door, it had the velcro there to put the sign, but someone had taken down the sign. The bathroom wasn't really dirty, just not clean ... can a bathroom be attractive? Today I was supposed to "shop" for a camera. It was really a good opportunity for me since I am looking for a camera any way. I went to the camera section and had to wait for about 10 minutes until the other customer had been waited on. Sometimes I feel like yelling to the employee, "Hey, I'm evaluating you, I'm more important than that other person." I just quietly waited for the sales associate to finish and he came over to me. I asked him about a specific camera, and found the power attachment didn't work and I couldn't find out how it worked. I didn't mention that on my write up to the company. I had to choose one camera that I had asked about so I had them show me a camera under the glass counter. It was a camera I have been looking for so it was good. I asked the sales associate comparison questions with the other camera that was there. I talked to him about the cameras, and took some pictures using the two different cameras. The batteries worked on these cameras, and that is what I wrote the company about. After finishing with the camera section I had to buy something for $30 so I just looked at the shelves for that amount. A very nice girl came buy to help me choose the right item, and she put her sticker on it to show that she had helped me to pick the item. I almost told her not to worry about it, that I would be bringing the item back in and hour. She was nice and helpful, so I wrote about how helpful she was so the company would read her name on my store evaluation. It took me about 30 minutes to do the shopping, then another hour to write the evaluation, and I get paid $20 to do the job. I don't know how much that works out in a wage, but it is kind of fun, and makes me feel a little powerful. So, just don't tell anyone that I am doing this, and if you see me shopping in your store treat me with RESPECT! And, put that sign on the bathroom door and clean the bathroom.

Speaking English

This morning I met a friend and had some coffee together. We talked about the importance of immigrants speaking English when they come to this country. After the coffee I went to teach at a company, engineers that come here for a few months and then return to Shanghai. The engineers come here and they work LONG days of 12 - 16 hours. They don't have transportation, so the company puts them in apartments that are walking distance to the office. They walk to the office, work long hours, then walk home and sleep. During the weekends they are often tired and just want to sleep, or don't have transportation to travel and see the area. The survive here, but barely. Then the company wonders why they have such a bad attitude when they allow the engineers to visit the USA. These engineers have good English skills, but they are hesitant to go out into the public. Even in the office they don't really have casual conversations with their English speaking coworkers. Talking with my friend reminded me of when my family returned back from Korea. Lindsey went to Korea when she was 3, and came back when she was in 5th grade. She spoke English before she went to Korea and spoke ok when she came back. Jayne was 1 when she went to Korea and didn't speak much, and came back when she was in 3rd grade, her English as very minimal. Sarah was born in Korea and didn't know more than 10 English words when she came to the US. When we arrived at San Francisco airport and the seat belt lights went off Sarah said something in Korean and the other two girls and their mother laughed. I asked what she said and I was told that Sarah said that now we were in the USA that they could only speak English. The reason it was so funny was because she was the one that didn't speak English, but she was adamant that they should speak ONLY English. When I was in the Army I lived in Huntsville, AL. When I was there I had a Boston Terrier and took the dog to dog shows around Alabama and Tennessee. It was fun and I met some great people. My dog did okay, but wasn't ever going to do very good, just okay. One of the men that I met, and I became good friends with was an old German man. He had a very nice german shepherd that did about as well as my dog in competitions. He and I started going to dog shows together in his old VW. As we drove to dog shows he began telling me about himself and his story was fantastic! He was a scientist in Nazi Germany during the Second World War. After the war he was riding his bike from southern Germany to his home in Hamburg in northern Germany. He stopped at his old friend's house on his way. His friend, Vincent Von Braun, was the "father of the V2 rocket". He was putting a team together and asked my friend if he wanted to go to the USA to help develop a rocket program. My friend said okay, and called his wife that he would be back in six months, since that was how long the contract was for. Von Braun was sitting next to my friend on the plane as it took off and said that it would be the last time they would see Germany. When asked why he said that in six months the families would be brought to the USA and they would end up settling there. The team developed the rockets that sent men to the moon. They ended up taking their families to Huntsville because it reminded the scientists of the mountainous Alps. When the families came to Alabama Von Braun called them all together and told them that they will only speak English from then on, no more German, even at home. So, that was that ...

Oxford Seminars class of December 2010

I haven't written in a while. I haven't been that busy, but didn't feel a passion to write. Yesterday I finished my last class of the year, in San Francisco. The December class was 14 students. This was a great bunch of students that all had a specific purpose for taking the class. I often have students that pay more than $1000 for the class and then they wonder what they will do after the class. I have had classes that 80% ended up going to their normal lives after taking my class. This class we had one girl that will leave right after Christmas to go to Chile (isn't it summer there in January?), one man will go to Japan and get married and live there for a year, one guy is on his way to Spain, and another woman is going to New Zealand. This class had one of the most beautiful women I have ever had in my class, she was going to go to the Philippines and teach, but plans change at the last minute. I was able to advise a couple of people where to go, I usually suggest Taiwan because it is warm in the winter, otherwise Korea is a great place. I spend 3 consecutive weekends, Saturday and Sunday 10 hours a day, trying to teach future teachers different ways to teach English in other countries. I try to show my students different ways to have exciting and interesting classes. I often tell them that their students can't learn if they can't laugh, so we spend a lot of time on different games that we can use to teach English and I try to give them experience in teaching classes. Rather than having them use most of the time reading during class, then discuss the reading; I have my students read for homework and then we discuss the reading during the class. With the extra time I give each student the opportunity to teach classes each day of our course and even try to bring in actual ESL students for them to teach. I am almost always amazed at the growth of my students, from the first class they teach to the practicum exercise that is like their final exam. I try to make my students realize that the class they use for their practicum can be used for the demonstration lesson they do when they attempt to get a job. I also have them dress in nice clothes so they feel like teachers. I feel over all my students get good experience in my class. This month we had a girl that had taken the first 2 weekends of the class with another instructor and then did her practicum with my class. It was interesting to see the difference between the way my students teach and others. My students are great!!

Is it LOVE ...

On Monday I drove to Lower Lake again, I really enjoy that drive and the schools there are nice. I was a little upset when I was there and the counselor was telling me some of the things the recruiters did. One recruiter parties with the students, another takes students to the office and tries to pressure them into signing paperwork to go into the military. The recruiter that works with me had been there the previous week and saying how he hates the area and how he hates visiting that school. It made me wonder why I go to the school, which is to help the recruiter to work well with the schools. Oh well, I must continue! After Lower Lake I drove to Ferndale, 4 hours north of Lower Lake. Tuesday I worked in Ferndale High, which has 34 seniors. It was a fun school and the students scored very high on the test. I drove back that day taking 100 pictures on the way, even though it was raining all the way (6 hours). Wednesday I worked at Dublin High then Deer Valley High. Those are huge schools that have more people in the senior class than the schools on the previous days have in their whole school. On my trip I stayed in a hotel and had nothing much to do so I was talking to a girl I know about a guy she had met a few months ago. She told me all the things she didn't like about him and could not understand anything she saw in him. Well, she said he was handsome and had a great job. She said she didn't like the way he treated her and never liked to do the things she liked. She likes to travel and he likes to stay home. She stopped seeing him for a few months, had a couple of other boyfriends in the mean time, then he called and she was excited to see him again. She asked me what was wrong with her and I said simply that she was in love. She asked why, and said there were many things she didn't like about him and really didn't like hanging out with him and I told her it sounded like they were married already. Why have the honeymoon period and just go straight to the period where you are comfortable with each other. In fact, isn't it true that we can't rationalize who we fall in love with? I think that when we find that person that we want to be with, but don't know why .... then isn't that love? Love is when we don't know why we want to be with a person, yet we will do anything to be with them. Am I wrong?

Friends

Today I taught again in San Francisco. I did much better and my students were great! I really think every class gets better. I invited some guys from France to come to my class today, with some guys from China so my students had some actual ESL students to teach. The classes they taught were very good, and the visitors had a great time, that they will never forget. Isn't it interesting how quick we can make friends, but does it really last. We all have many friends over the years, but what happens to them. I wonder how things like Facebook and email will affect the way we keep in touch with friends in the future. Sam Retherford was my best friend from 6th - 8th grade. We were always together, he picked me up every morning and we walked to school together. He lived across from me and we were in Boy Scouts together. Everything that happened to me I would run over to his house and talk to him about. Whenever he had nothing to do he would come over to my house and we would do "nothing" together. Sam moved when we went into 9th grade, his father was transferred to Washington state. Of course we both said we would keep in touch, and we probably sent a letter within the first week. Who am I kidding, neither of us tried to keep in touch, even though we did have telephones even that long ago. Life went on without Sam, I went to high school, graduated, went to college, majored in Elementary Education and ROTC. In the summer after my junior year I went to ROTC summer camp. The first day we had to go on a bus and get our uniforms and I was sitting next to a guy from another school. We talked about where we went to college and where we went to high school. We talked about what we would like to do in the Army. We got in line and he was in front of me. We got our uniforms and then went to pick up our name tags, the guy I had been talking to on the bus picked up his name tag and it said "RETHERFORD". I told him that I used to have a friend named Retherford, and his first name was Sam. He told me his first name was Sam. Then we realized that we were best friends when we were young. It felt so strange and we couldn't even understand that we were the same people, but it was true. In the 6 weeks of summer camp Sam and I built our friendship up again. We were together often and found out everything that had gone on since we had last met. When the summer camp was over we said good bye, and of course told each other we would keep in touch. And of course, we both went back to our colleges and didn't keep in touch. I went into the Army, got my training in Alabama, went to Germany, and then back to Alabama for more training then was assigned to Alabama for a few years. During my time in Alabama I had to go on a business trip to Washington. I was in a meeting and I noticed a familiar face in the same meeting. Sam was there. He had joined the Army, gone to training in Indiana, gone to South Carolina, the back to Indiana for more training, then was in Washington. He had gotten married and we promised to keep in touch. We didn't. A few years later I was sent to Korea. I was a commander and often got paperwork from the General's office. The General never signs his own correspondence. I don't even have to write the next part, but, the signature on the General's correspondence was Sam Retherford. I called him and we met once. We laughed about the way we always ran into each other. About 15 years later I had access to military email addresses and found Sam Retherford was listed. I emailed him and said hi, he emailed back and said he lived near Washington D.C. and if I was ever in the area I should let him know. That hasn't happened yet, but I wouldn't be surprised if sometime Sam and I crossed paths.

Twentieth Class

Today was day 3 of my Oxford Seminars class. I should be able to do this class in an outstanding manner. Today was not the best day :(. I was in cruise control all day. I feel like the students didn't get their money's worth today. The truth is that it was a good class, the students have shown how much they have learned and come along. The students did a better job today in teaching their classes than I did. Isn't that what a teacher wants, to have their students do better than they do? I am proud of my class of teachers, they ROCK. After class I went to my first professional hockey game with David, Jonathon, and Elaine. I am so happy to have gone with them. Without the great company the game would have really been boring, but instead the game was fun!

Willits High School

Today I went to Willits High School. This school is on Highway 101, just on the side of the freeway. It is was an older school up in the mountains in a small town. When I went into the school I thought it must be exactly like the school my mom went to. In fact, the counselor that was showing me around mentioned the school hadn't really been updated since the 1920s. It was fun to walk around the school and think about the thousands of kids that have graduated from that little school. I hope I made a positive impression on the students I talked to.

Diversity

Today I drove 3 hours north to Potter Valley High School. This was a great little school that was attached to the middle school and elementary school. The senior class was 20 kids, the whole high school was 80. They had grown up with each other, knowing each other since kindergarten. The interesting thing about the school was the lack of diversity. I saw one Asian, and that was the computer teacher. I saw 7 Hispanics and they were walking home together so it seemed like they were from the same family. I can't imagine growing up like that. One reason I like the high school my kids attend was because of the diversity. I remember living in Korea and they were proud of their homogeneous society. But what happens when there isn't diversity is that you fear what you don't know. You don't learn to understand other's points of view and your whole life is narrow. My oldest daughter liked her uniqueness (being the only American at the whole school) and took advantage of it. I remember when she was in third grade she decided to have her ears pierced since the Korean kids couldn't do that. She told me that she was American so the school said it was ok for her to pierce her ears. The whole family went to the beauty parlor for Lindsey to get her ears pierced. On the way, Lindsey convinced her younger sister to do it also. I wasn't sure it that was the best idea, but Lindsey has always been very persuasive. So, when we got to the beauty parlor guess who was the first to get their ears pierced, Jayne of course. Lindsey suggested that Jayne go first, and guaranteed to Jayne it wasn't going to hurt. I can still see the lady using that "gun" to pierce the first ear, as soon as the first ear was pierced Lindsey asked Jayne if it hurt. Jayne looked at Lindsey and her eyes watered and ONE tear fell down her cheek. That was enough for Lindsey, she got up and walked out the door. I stretched my arm out and pulled Lindsey back in. By that time Jayne's second ear was done and I put Lindsey up on the chair. It was so funny then to hear Jayne convince Lindsey it didn't hurt much. They both walked home that day with their ears pierced.

I can also remember when I was in first grade we lived in East Orange, New Jersey. My best friend was black, but I didn't realize he was black, if that makes any sense. I grew up with my father in the army so race was never anything I identified with. I can remember one day going to the bus stop and some "big kids" were picking on me. They were asking me why I had a black friend. I seriously didn't know what they were talking about. I got hit at the bus stop that day and I can remember going home crying. when my mom asked me what happened I told her I didn't know. I told her I got hit and I didn't understand why. She then told me what the kids were upset about, but I really didn't understand. I'm glad I grew up with many kinds of diversity.

Good Dad, Bad Dad

Yesterday I was really busy, I started in San Francisco meeting with someone that wanted to join the National Guard, then I had to drive to San Francisco State University, then I had to drive to Livermore High School (where the sign in front of the school said "no horse riding"), then I had to drive to Santa Clara High School for a school site meeting, then I attended a few minutes of the sports award banquet (Sarah got All League!), then I had to go meet some more people that want to join the National Guard in San Jose. This morning I went to Alisal High School in Salinas then drove to my mom's house in Monterey then drove to North Salinas High School ... then drove back to Santa Clara High School to pick up Sarah at school. Tomorrow I'm on my way to Potter Valley High School which is a 3 hour drive north. I picked up some audio books tonight for tomorrow's drive and next week's marathon.

Today in Salinas I worked with SFC Davila. I really like him and have much respect for him. He and I spent time between  the two schools talking. I asked him if he was going to retire soon and he told me he was looking for a job to get after he retired, and if he found a job that he wanted, then he would retire. He has four young kids and I asked him how he could keep the long hours with his kids so young. SFC Davila (Filipe) lives about 2 hours from his office. He often works until 10 or 11 pm and then is often in his office around 8 or 9am. How he keeps up these hours I don't know, but the fire in his eyes shows he really enjoys his job. I asked him about his kids and whether he feels he is being fair to them by working such long hours. He told me his father used to beat him ... not just hit him, but beat him. He told me he really loves his dad and always has. I asked him if he was like a battered wife who blames herself for getting her husband upset at her. Filipe told me he never blamed himself when his dad beat him, but always loved him because he was his dad. It started me thinking about what kind of dad I am/was. A friend of mine told me I was a great dad today when he heard I had Sarah at my house until 9 tonight and then took her home. I think most of us dads compare ourselves to our own dads. I think we can not do that, because our dads are from a different generation (isn't that the definition of a generation...). What makes a good dad? Filipe thinks it is giving his kids things that he wasn't able to have when he was growing up. I think it has to do with how much personal time we give our kids. I feel a little sad that I can't give my kids more "things", and for many years I couldn't give them my personal time. Even though I haven't lived with my kids for many years I have made a point of living close to the kids. I have often done things for myself instead of for my kids. I wish I could have my kids live with me all their lives, but I had to make some tough decisions a few years ago. I thought it would be better for the girls to live with their mom, then their dad. I thought it would be best for the three sisters to grow up together, rather than be separated. I am very proud of my kids and feel they will have successful lives. I don't know if that has to do with me being a good dad, or their mom being a good mom, or a combination of the two, or in spite of mom and dad! Good job kids!